


The future of you and me

by Pearlislove



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Egg Laying, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-07
Updated: 2017-05-08
Packaged: 2018-09-22 16:50:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 13,909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9616640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pearlislove/pseuds/Pearlislove
Summary: Vastra, Jenny and the subject of children/eggs. A decision to make, and barely any time to make it. What will it be?





	1. The first discussion

**Author's Note:**

> My first Doctor Who fanfic.
> 
> 1 chapter can be read as a one-shot
> 
> Anyone but Jenny and Vastra make their entrance in the 2 or 3 chapter

Madame Vastra was more nervous than normal. 

 

She tried to hide it, obviously didn’t want her wife to notice, but as soon as Jenny caught sight of her she knew.

 

Slowly stepping further into the room, Jenny observed her wife where she sat in her favourite spot by the fire. She was always cold this time of year, and needed to absorb as much heat as she could to stay functional throughout the winter months. It was, however, not the weather that had her on edge. Whatever it was that bothered Vastra ti could not have with the cold to do, for Jenny knew that where she was sitting she would normally feel perfectly comfortable.

 

The lizard from the dawn of time was trying to sit still, but every little sound had her twitching and twisting, and Jenny couldn’t help but feel concerned that something would be wrong with her wife, for she was not usually this tense.

 

“Vastra?” She whispered carefully, not wishing to disturb but wanting to ask what was wrong.

 

“You smell of blood.” Vastra countered, twitching once more as head tilted upwards, crest flaring and sniffing the air. The Silurian had an excellent nose, and could sometimes notice that she smelled of blood days before it even started.

 

“It’s my monthly. Sorry darling.” Jenny apologised swiftly, knowing how uncomfortable it made Vastra when she smelled of lots of blood, but knowing equally well that she couldn’t help it. Feeling quite spent from the day's adventures running after a murderer, she lowered herself into one of the arm chairs. “Are you okay?”

 

At this, Vastra flinched visibly. Her whole body moved, instinctively bending away from Jenny, before quickly settling back into its earlier position. “Of course, my love. Why wouldn’t I be?” She was still not facing Jenny, and she was starting to worry that something was seriously wrong with her wife. 

 

Or, maybe she was just stressed? And a little put off that Jenny hadn’t allowed her to eat the murderer today, but had to deliver him to Scotland Yard instead. It had been obvious that she had wanted to. 

 

Vastra sigh. It was hard deduce the thoughts and feelings of someone with minimum facial features who weren’t even looking at her. “You just seem a little stressed, that’s all. Want me to draw you a bath?” 

 

Again, Vastra flinched, pulling away before sitting back in the same situation again, hoping it would not be noticeable. “No thanks dear. You might need one, though. So much blood.” She shuddered, body shaking with disgust and discomfort at the mere smell. Not for the first time, Jenny felt a bit ashamed of her body’s natural process and the way it disgusted her wife.

 

“Sorry.” She doesn’t want to draw away, not when something was obviously wrong with her wife, but she can’t help it. She feels filthy and ashamed. “I can go somewhere else if it bothers you too much.” She offers, getting up from the chair. Maybe the reasons he was so tense was all the blood smell. Wouldn’t be the first time.

 

Jenny only meant to be kind, but instead it seemed to send Vastra into a sudden panic as she stood up, twirling around to face Jenny and screaming with sudden ferocity.

 

“Nasch! Nasch has!” In her hurry to stop Jenny, she isn’t speaking English but Silurian, and it comes out sounding like a combination of hissing and a cough. Not before she remember to speak English, can Jenny d'schiffer her message. “Please don’t go!” 

 

The sudden panic leave Jenny mortified, but she swallows her fear, nodding. Of course she wouldn’t leave, if her lover so badly wanted her to stay. “Wouldn’t dream of it.” She says kindly, daring to approach her lover, coming close enough that they were almost touching. “Just tell me what’s wrong.”

 

Vastra look away, and her scales seems to go a darker green, almost as though she’s blushing. “It’s embarrassing.” She says at last, and Jenny have to bite her lip hard not to laugh. All this trouble, just because she found something slightly embarrassing? And Jenny who had actually been frightened.

 

“Tell me. You're my wife, you can trust me.” She beckons, stepping even closer and letting her hand come out to touch her wife’s arm, squeezing it to show that she was there for her.

 

“It’s...the Silurian equivalent to a monthly, I suppose. At least I think that’s how you mammals would say it.” She says, eyes wandering around the room and looking everywhere but Jenny’s face.“But it’s...it’s not monthly. And there is no blood.” Again, she shivers at the idea of all the blood. Really, Jenny found it almost comical how squeamish her wife, the predator Lizard Warrior from the dawn of time, was about blood when it was not included in her meal.

 

“But you lay eggs!” Jenny protested. Monthly for Silurians? Surely it couldn’t be!

 

“My  _ kind  _ lay eggs!” Vastra corrected, snapping, something sad passing over her face as she hesitantly continued. “I can’t. They break before I lay them. I...that’s what I meant by monthly. Expelling what is left of the eggs.” She cradled her abdomen with her hands and looks sadder than Jenny has ever seen her, claw-like hands trying to protect something she was destined to lose. 

 

She had often wondered what happened with the eggs that Vastra should, according to what she had learned about Silurian anatomi, be lying at least once a year, even if they went unfertilized as there was no male Silurian around. She never dared asking, though, because it felt improper and wrong, but now she almost wish she did. It would have been better than doing it this way.

 

Jenny doesn’t know what to do. What do you do when your wife admits to being unable to carry a child - egg - and carries a look on her face that tell you that she’s never been more ashamed and saddened by something in her entire life? She doesn’t know. She and Vastra had never discussed children, didn’t know if there was any way for them to physically have them, but this? It was like crushing a dream before it even had the time to come into existence. It hurt.

 

“Does it hurt?” She doesn’t know why she asks, but she does. Her own monthly could hurt quite some at times, her stomach cramping and torturing her, but she didn’t know if it was the same for Silurians. 

 

Vastra look surprised, her head shooting up to look her in the eyes, and she can tell that this was not the response she’d been expecting. “Physically, it...it hurt a little. Our system is made to process whole eggs and lay them, but my eggs are too weak, they break when they are to be laid. It hurt to expel them.” Vastra admitted at last, and Jenny nodded sympathetically, extending her arms to hug the lizard, who made  a foul face but accepted the hug.

 

They don't  mention the psychological hurt that's sure to be there.

 

“You know I'm not mad at you for this, right?” Jenny asked, holding her wife tight, arms wrapped around her waist and her head resting on her shoulder. Vastra was rigid at first, but after a moment she recuperated. 

 

“It is a shame. The best genetic traits for a warrior, wasted on one who could  never pass them on. I am a shame.” Vastra said after a moment of silence, her head coming to rest on top of her lover's as she pulled her even closer to her. Silurians couldn’t cry, for they lacked tear canals, but she was sure that if she could she would have. It broke Jenny's heart to hear Vastra so upset, and she wished she knew how to make her feel better. 

 

“You’re not a shame. It's not your fault, and you can not feel responsible for what your body won't do.” Jenny said, firmly. She didn’t want her beloved Vastra to believe that she was a failure for she could not bear children. “Eggs or no eggs, I love you.” She kiss her, reaching up on her tiptoes to be able to place a kiss on her crest, the most private part on a Silurians body. She can see the Silurian shaking with pleasure at the lingering touch of her lips again the light green scales in that special spot. 

 

The silurian smiled, if only slightly. “I love you too, dear.” Vastra kissed Jenny too, right on the hairline where her crest would have been if she’d been Silurian.

 

They stood there for a long time hugging and occasionally kissing, trying to comfort each other. Or more exactly, comfort Vastra. 

 

Because they will never have children, and Jenny is okay with that. It is no one's fault and she doesn't want anyone to feel bad about it.

  
Especially not Vastra.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am so happy people like this...I really like it and it's my little baby. This chapter is a short interlude, and in the next chapter the real stuff will start happening! :D

Three weeks pass after the discussion about Vastra being unable to lay eggs. It is a comfortable three weeks, and they get along just as fine as they’ve ever done, but the whole discussion seem to linger.

 

In the street, they point at the mother trying to catch up with her wayward children and laugh, claiming how lucky they are it will never be them. Imagine a little Silurian loose in the streets, running as fast as Vastra when she was hunting, knowing very well they wouldn’t stand a chance.

 

In the toy store, when they're shopping for a gift for the daughter of one of the Inspectors at Scotland Yard, they sigh over a crying child behind them in line. They shake their heads and wince at the sound and proclaim they are lucky it will never be them. They wouldn’t have the patience to deal with a child like that.

 

They take it in good humour, they are happy, but it still lingers, nestling into their everyday life like it didn’t use to when they didn’t think of it. But now the subject is there and though the verdict is set it keeps coming back.

 

Vastra is acting more and more unlike herself, and if she didn’t know better Jenny would say her wife was hiding something from her. It worries Jenny to think that the whole ordeal might hurt Vastra more than she shows, and that perhaps she refused to tell Jenny of the pain it cause her because she is still ashamed of her short coming.

  
Jenny hopes not.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> :D This is gonna be great

One night, Jenny is awoken by screaming. Always ready for combat, she sit up in bed with her fists in their air and sweeps her head from side to side to locate the enemy.

Only there is no enemy. The grandfather clock in the corner says three in the morning, and there is no enemies to be seen anywhere. No ruffians with knives and dangerous smiles, no faceless aliens with poison at their fingertips, no nothing.

Only at her third sweep of the room, does Jenny notice that Vastra as well as her pillow is missing from the bed. The sheets where she should be laying are wrinkled and disheveled, as if someone left the bed with great haste, and when she lifts the covers she finds an oddly coloured purple stain on the mattress. It smells like raw chicken and she move her nose away from it as soon as she felt the smell.

“Aaah!” A second scream emanates throughout the entire room, and the sound of it makes Jenny's blood go cool because she recognizes it all too well. It's Vastra screaming, sounding as though she was in a lot of pain. 

She doesn't waste a second in coming to her lovers aid as she threw herself out of bed, sprinting across the room without grabbing something to cover her up a little more and continuing out into the hallway.

It is there that she finds her. Completely naked, her white nightgown taken of and torn to shreds between Vastra’s sharp claws, she is lying on her side in the hallway with her head towards Jenny and the door to their bedroom.

She looks spent, exhausted beyond belief as her eyes were half-closed and her whole body involuntarily shacking.

“Vastra!” Jenny can't help a scream of her own when she sees her, running over to her side and kneeling beside her. “Vastra what happened?”

She is terrified, afraid that her wife somehow hurt herself or was attacked while Jenny slept.

Carefully, she cradles her lover's face in her hands, placing it on her knee as she waited for a reply.

“I...I did it…” Finally, after what seems like an eternity, Vastra manages to muster the energy to give her wife, who was now cradling her upper body in her lap, a reply.

“Did what? Vastra!” Jenny can't help the panic creeping into her voice as she sees Vastra closing her eyes, drifting off into unconsciousness as the last of her remaining energy left her. Fruitlessly, she hit her across the scaly cheeks to try and wake her up without result. “Vastra tell me!”

She doesn’t receive a reply, and realising that he wife is not going to be waking up for quite some time, Jenny starts to look around once more, trying to deduce the situation for herself. She was the assistant of the veiled detective, surely she could figure this out.

In the end, it is not so much about figuring anything out, though, as it is to notice what is in front of her. Still, to Jenny’s great shame, it is not she who does it, but Strax.

Having been awoken by the noise, the potato head comes rushing out of his room in full battle uniform, only to stop short upon noticing the unconscious Vastra and Jenny.

“You did not tell me you were attempting to breed a new generation of proud warriors to fight for the glory of Earth” The Sontaran warrior sounds surprised, but Jenny is feeling even more shocked by the statement, for it can only mean one thing.

Slowly glancing down inbetween Vastras wide-spread legs, she notice not only the missing pillow from their bedroom, but resting upon it - three eggs. Two smaller, brown ones, and one big green one, all of them perfectly safe and hole without a single crack that Jenny could see.

“She did it.” She whispered, confused and almost angry. She had told her that they broke, that she’d been expelling what was left of them, only three weeks ago. Silurians only lay eggs once every year according to Silurian calendar - whatever that meant. The point was, that the eggs couldn’t be there, and yet they were.

“Ma’am, do you wish for me to dispose of these?” Strax, blunt and thick as he always was, is pointing his highly unstable, self-built plasma gun in the general direction of the eggs, and Jenny almost scream at him because these were Vastras eggs and he could not hurt them.

“No! Strax, call for the Doctor!” She gives him a task, tell him to do something, and hope it will do. Strax needed a mission, and she needs a Doctor. The Doctor. She needed someone who could determine if Vastra and the eggs were healthy, and what they were to do with them. There was no male Silurian there to fertilize them, after all, so they couldn't survive, could they? Somehow the thought of letting them die after all Vastra had evidently went through to lay them seemed too cruel, especially considering it is probably the first and last eggs Vastra would ever lay.

The Sontaran leave, muttering something about killing everyone who will stand in his way as he contacts the doctor, and Jenny is left all alone with Vastra, wondering what was to happen. So many concerns, so much fear and anguish pumping through her body and she feels lost, finally deciding to do nothing by wait until the doctor got there, hoping it was not a bad decision.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, in the last chapter, Strax went to message The Doctor. Did he get the message?

“So, where to this time, dear Ponds?” The Doctor asks, grinning excitedly at Amy and Rory, waiting for their verdict. He had, after all, promised them they’d get to chose this time and he’d do his very best to make it happen (they didn’t speak of the Barcelona/Cardiff accident, but Amy still hated his guts for it).

 

Suddenly, he feels a buzzing in his pocket, vibrating and forcing his attention to it as it sent uncomfortable shivers down his leg. He sticks his hand into the pocket, wondering what it might be, and as he extracts it again he sees that he’s holding his psychic paper, thick and leder like as he opened it to look inside.

Someone sent him a message.

“Doctor, what is that?” Amy asks, concerned, looking up at him from where she and Rory was standing by the doors. They’d just closed them behind them, and was understandably worried as their ‘anywhere you want’ trip already appeared to be threatened, as it so often were. In fact, Amy and Rory didn't think theyäd had ever actually gotten to chose their destination in the end. And even if they had, they hadn't ended up there. 

“It’s the psychic paper! I got a message!” The Doctor smiles, excited to be getting a message.  Usually, it meant a great adventure. “Lizard has procured offspring to help protect the empire, boy is demanding The Doctor’s presence.”

The Doctor frowns at the message, seeing it's clumsy handwriting and bad wording, and after three moments thought he finally realise what's happened, a light bulb turning on in his head and sending him into a sudden hurry.

“Doctor, what's going on?” Amy shouts, and both her and Rory are running up the stairs to get to the control panel as they see him getting going. It couldn’t be anything but urgent if it sent him into such a frenzy. “Where are we going?”

The Doctor looked at the for a moment, seemingly considering his options, and then he smiled a big grin. “Do you remember the interspecies Silurian/Human lesbian couple who I employed to help save Melody from the silence? Madame Vastra and Jenny Flint? And the Sontaran nurse, Strax?”

Rory and Amy looked at eachother, and then they nodded. “I think we do, Doctor. Are we going to visit them?” Rory asks, just as alarmed as his wife. It seemed very out of sorts with an out of the blue visit to this unique couple, especially as they hadn't ever met them before going there when they were going to save Melody, and hadn’t been there since, either.

“Yes. It seems as though they have tried to breed, to put it in Silurian terms, or procreate, in human terms, and are in need of some assistance from a Doctor.” He frowned a little, thinking back to Strax message. Jenny (the maid?) would not have asked for him to call on him unless it was absolutely necessary.  More so, it could only be urgent if Vastra hadn’t opted to do it for herself, but let Jenny and Strax handle it. If Vastra had been unable to do it herself. The Doctor _knew_ his Silurian friend prefered controlling the contact between him and their family of sorts.

“So you're saying that we’re off to deliver the baby of a lizard/Human lesbian couple?” Amy asked carefully, not wanting to offend The Doctor but not quite sure she heard right. Delivering hybrid babies? Really? She sweared sometimes he could surprise her just as much as he did the day he crashed in her garden.

  
“In nineteenth century London!” The Doctor confirmed, pulling one last blinking bright green switch as they went in for the landing in the mentioned destination.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy hell, here we go!

Sitting motionless on the edge of the bed, Jenny is finally snapped out of her thoughts by the whining noise of the TARDIS materializing in her bedroom. She’s been waiting for a while, now, and with some help from Strax she managed to move both the eggs and Vastra safely into the bedroom, where they’d be warm and protected. Vastra still hasn't stirred, though, and Jenny prays to whatever god might be listening that she won't be hurt. She couldn’t take it if Vastra had gotten hurt and she’d done absolutely nothing but sleep and dream.

 

After what feels like an enternity, the doors to the TARDIS finally opens, and out come The Doctor. He’s uncoordinated, stummbling though there is virtually nothing to trip on, and followed closely by two of his companions. Jenny remembers them, remember fruitlessly trying to save their child from an organisation who believed she could be an answer to their prayers - religious beside being just nutjobs, it had seemed - and feels a little bad knowing that in the end it didn’t help at all. They had lost their child, thoguh Jenny and Vastra did their very best.

 

The Doctor that’s come for her is not The Doctor Jenny had expected. Instead of being all furrowed brows and thick Scottish accents, like she thought he’d be, it's the spitting image of a twelve-year-old with a bowtie, The Doctor who had called them to war so long ago. 

 

Not that Jenny cares. Jenny was beoynd happy to accept whatever version of the time travelling alien that was willing to come to her rescue.

 

“Jenny!” He exclaims, grinning happily, so different from when the last met, but the smile quickly die out as he sees her trembling frown. She is upset, of course she is upset, and it seems to upset him, too. “What’s wrong?” He asks, and he looks like a child who found his mom crying in the kitchen, and doesn’t know why.

 

It make Jenny feel guilty. The Doctor already has so much weighing down his conscious, the faith of the universe quite literally resting on his shoulders, paining him and dragging down his mood. The last thing he needed was Jenny dragging down his mood as well.

 

“Vastra had eggs.” She explain slowly, trying to keep her calm though she can feel the tears threatening to spill over. Her emotions are embaressing, she was never the kidn fo person who cried openly, but she finds she can’t help them as she shakily continuous. “I don't...I don’t know what to do. Vastra passed out and I don’t know if we can save the eggs because we can't fertilize them which will mean that they will probably die and Vastra did all this for nothing!” Now, the tears are coming for real, and she can feel herself breaking down. She knows the Doctor hate crying people, Vastra always told her so, but she can’t help it because it feels so absolutely utterly hopeless.

 

“Hey, hey, it's okay! I'm sure the Doctor can fix it. He’s the Doctor!” Without looking, hands covering her eyes as she cried, Jenny can feel arms wrapping around her, safe and warm and comforting. When she looks up, she sees the red head, Amy, holding her tight and hugging her. “Doctor?” She asks in her Scottish accent, looking at the Doctor, who is pointing his Sonic Screwdriver at both Vastra and the eggs, oblivious to or ignoring the scene next to him. 

 

“You do know Silurians normally lay eggs once a year? She should have laid approximately thirty eggs since the day you two met.” He informed them, studying the information the screwdriver was feeding back to him.

 

“I k-know” Jenny gulped, still held tight in Amy's embrace as more tears escaped. “But she told me she couldn’t - haven't- been able to lay eggs. They break, before she can get them out. All she does is expel liquids and egg shells. We discussed it only three weeks ago, I thought she already lost this year's eggs.”

 

At this, The Doctor looks concerned, alarmed almost, but only for a second before smiling again, nodding alogn with the explanation. “Well, obviously not. You have big, strong, Silurian eggs here. Happy, happy occasion. How did the laying of the eggs happen?”

 

The Doctor looks at her expectingly, but Jenny couldn’t do anything but shake her head, slowly starting to feel quite tired. It was still early in the morning, and between going to be quite late and beign chased otu of bed again only a few hours later she hadn’t gotten much sleep at all-

 

“What do you mean no?” The Doctor asked, serious, almost angry.

 

“I wasn't there. She didn’t tell me, didn’t wake me up. I...I found her and the eggs afterwards.”  Jenny felt scared, as though she was going to be punished for her answer. For being a useless wife who couldn’t be there for her wife when she needed her. 

 

“That’s horrible!” Amy protested, hugging Jenny even closer, and though the contact was unasked for it felt welcome. It made her feel like she was understood, not judged, for what had happened.

 

“I think, I think she thought I didn’t want children...er...eggs. We joked a lot ‘bout being lucky that we would never be parents, after she told me she couldn’t lay eggs. If she found out the eggs seemed to be surviving, she might be afraid I’d be angry, or disappointed…” Jenny really didn't know what Vastra could have been thinking, but she had obviously hidden facts from Jenny. It had been meant to help, all those jokes, to help it feel less heavy, not make it come out like this.

 

She wasn’t supposed to feel guilty for neither laying eggs nor not laying eggs. She was supposed to be happy.

  
  


“Jenny.” The Doctor says slowly, purposely, intending to catch her attention. He was smiling again. “I’ve scanned all of them. Both Vastra and the eggs are perfectly healthy. Vastra’s values are a bit low due to the recent birth, but it’s nothing to worry about. Now, do you want me to tell you the gender of the eggs?”

 

Jenny didn’t know what to say. Did she want to know the gender of the eggs? She didn’t even know if they could survive. Could she really live with herself if she knew them, if she knew that they could have sons or daughters? The chances of loosign them was so big, she feared it’d break her heart more than this hole ordeal had already broken Vastra’s.

 

“Jenny?” Amy patted her lightly on the shoulder. She’d loosened her grip, sensing Jenny’s need for some privacy, but was still holding onto her with one arm for comfort.

 

“I do not think I can do it, ma’am.” The thought, of the gender of the children, of keeping them and of talking about them as though they're living, is what finally make Jenny snap. 

 

Feeling entierly calm and yet so,so upset at the same time, Jenny breaks free from Amy and gets off the bed. She doesn’t quite know what she’s doing, but she feels the need to get away from that room, away from The Doctor and Amy and Rory and Vastra and the eggs and everything else that is so upsetting it makes her head swim and her stomach knot.

 

So she run, and she run, and she run.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is River ever going to get to snog the Doctor? Which Doctor? No one knows! Does this even have anything to do with Vastra and Jenny and the main plot to do at all???? Read and see!

13 Paternoster Row is a big house, much too big for Jenny’s liking and it feels like she is running for an eternity, maybe more, before she reaches her wife’s treasured conservatory. She doesn't know what she is doing here, of all places, sudden surge of anger making her want to smash it all to bits, but can't be bothered to care as the anger drains and she falls down on her knees amongst the plants. It smells sweet and moist and a little wet and she thinks of all the times she’s found her wife sleeping here on warm summer nights.

 

She doesn’t want to be here but she’s not running anymore.

 

She feels the tears dripping from her eyes long before she sees the wet marks on her skirt. It bothers her, her upbringings mantra of  _ don’t be weak, don’t cry, don’t be the woman they see you as  _ echoing in her head as the tears continue to fall. It’s not who she is but she can’t help it

 

“Miss Flint! What are you doing here? Where  _ am I _ ?!” Suddenly, a shrill voice calls out for Jenny, and she can hear the sheer surprise of the woman who called. For a moment, there’s  fear beating in her chest, but then she’s looking up and what meets her is one of the beautiful faces Jenny knows. There is soft skin, long fluttering eyelashes and plump lips and  _ so much hair _ , golden curls stretching out in every direction.

 

_ Professor River Song _

 

_ The Doctor’s wife _

 

Jenny knows her, in some ways more than she would like, but she doesn’t exactly dislike her and she’s not mad at her for being there. The question, however, was what she was doing there. In agreeance with palpable surprise in her voice her lips shaped in a little ‘o’ and her eyes are big, looking around and obviously not being quite aware where or when she is. 

 

Quickly scrubbing away a few lingering tears from her face, Jenny tried to gather the energy to answer the question that she’s now realised been hanging in the air between them for too long. “Miss Song. Might I inquire what  _ you  _ are doing in  _ our  _ conservatory?” She reverse engineer the question, turning it back to River. She wasn’t in the mood to answer any of her questions, either way.

 

“Well, I was  _ trying _ to pop in for a visit to my boyfriend, if you know what I mean. Oh and the bowtie, please. Twelve foot scarfs really aren't my thing.” River taps the clock on her arm impatiently, as if it will fix what ever fault led her to end up there with Jenny instead. A vortex manipulator, The Doctor had called that strange clock of hers, but Jenny never really understood his explanation  for what it did exactly. After a while, she just stopped asking. All she ever managed to gather, was that it made it possible for her to travel like the Doctor did. 

 

“Unless you’re in reality here to attempt another go at sharing a bed with  _ my wife _ , your suitor/husband is upstairs, though surely not waiting for you.” Jenny comments dryly, letting out a humourless laughter and trying not to be snappish though she is feeling increasingly upset. The whole house is already turned upside down and tense and filled with psychopaths and the last thing they need is another, and one who had shared a bed with her wife at that. It was a long time ago, well before Vastra met Jenny, and she really had no reason to be upset or jealous because of it, especially considering she  _ had  _ kissed The Doctor once,  but she felt jealous and upset because of a lot of things at the moment.

 

“That’s sweet of you, though I think I’d rather not. Silurians and Time Lords are jealous creatures, and we’d rather it not end up in any sort of love contest, or what do you think?” River shoots her a grin, apparently having taken Jenny’s earlier comment as a joke ad therefor  expecting her to smile too. And had it been any other day, she might have. It wasn’t like Jenny couldn’t see why soem people would find it funny...

 

But not now, not when her wife is unconscious and the whole world seem to be falling apart and despite not wanting to cry any more more tears are evidently falling down her face and landing with a splatter on the ground.

 

“What’s wrong? Why are you crying? I didn't really mean to ofend you, I would never  _ share a bed  _ with Vastra as you put it, not when she got you. Those time were fun, but a thing of the past. I’m so sorry if you believed that.” At that moment, despite her normally cocky attitude, she looks and sounds like a child. Lost and scared, fearing the wrath of her mother (or might that be The Doctor? He certainly would not like River teasing Jenny) and seekign amendment for whatever she did wrong.

 

“V-Vastra had eggs” Jenny choke out, still trying to stifle her tears as the other woman sit down beside her. She doesn’t want to spill it all to  _ Proffessor River Song  _ but evidentally she is. “She didn’t tell me she was expecting ‘em. I...I thought she couldn't ‘ave any. I just don't… I can’t deal with it!”

 

She is so scared, it’s surrealistic. Everything is spinning and she’s dizzy and nauseous and just want this ridiculous nightmare to  _ end _ because it’s been going on for far too long and it’s not even  _ scary  _ anymore it’s just impossible and tortuous.

 

“Oh...oh sweetie!” Before she knows it, River has wrapped her up in a tight hug, holding her against her chest and rubbing circles on her back. She’s warm and safe and motherly and  Jenny doesn’t know why she accept her comfort but she does, crying against her shoulder though it feels like she should have run out of tears long ago. In her embrace, she slowly starts to calm down. The adrenaline rush which has been keeping her going up until this point finally starts wearin off and the logical part of her mind starts winning ground again, making her realise how much of an idiot she's been.

 

It had taken her by surprise, everything that happened, and human as she was, she’d been unable to handle it.

 

“Feeling better, sweetie?” After a while, River removes her from her chest, holding her far enough away so that they can look each other in the eyes. She is smiling, but it's bittersweet and it seems as though she understands what Jenny is feeling.

 

Lookign at her like that, River reminded Jenny something fiercly of Amy, her mother who just so happened to be younger than she was. People could say what they wnated but Jenny could see the similarities between them.

 

“A little, thank you.” Jenny blush a little, trying a weak smile. She did feel better by quite some, and she believed that she was a little more ready to face the situation, now. I

 

River laughed, almost giggling, and patted her on the cheek. “You know, I should really not be here. Hopefully it won't change too much in your timeline.”

 

“You’re from the future?” Jenny asked, biting her lip to keep herself from asking a question about the future. It would be so easy, if she could convince Professor Song to tell her if they had children in the future. If they could fertilize the eggs somehow, and they could hatch.

 

If they would be happy with whatever decision they made.

 

“Sweetie, you know I can't tell the future.” River Song smile, putting a finger on Jenny's lips as to stop her from asking the question she knows she's not allowed to ask either way. It almost make her want to scoff, as though she doesn't know better, as though she was like The Doctor who literally said anything and everything that appeared in that brain of his. It was a hard concpet, all this time traveling stuff, yes, but ti didn’t make her stupid. “But I can tell you that you better be ready to run in three minutes.”

 

“What?” All her panic seemed to resurface, as she tried to figure out why she had to run so soon, btu couldn’t find a logical reason in her suddenly panicked brain.

 

“1….2...3!” River showed the minutes passing with her fingers, and then, it happened.

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New chapter! No more cliffanger for now!

“JENNY!” Screaming for her was none other The Doctor himself, running into the room a minute after his voice, and at that point Jenny was just about ready to burst, in no small part due to River’s warming. The sight of The Doctor as he actually enters the room doesn't quell her worries, though, as she’d hoped, but if possible it amplifies them. His clothes had tears in them that showed blood red scratches underneth and his hair was worse than usual, and Jenny couldn’t help letting out a horrid gasp but he hardly seemed to notice, blushing and gaping at his wife-to be/ Wife already instead. “Oh,  _ hello sweetie! _ ”

 

Jenny wants to slap him. She wants to slap him so hard because something might have happened to her wife and her - their?  Eggs and he had the audacity to be ogling his damn wife instead of telling her what happened!

 

River, thankfully, seemed to notice Jenny’s growing unrest and cut in. “Oh please, focus on Jenny, Bowtie. That and why your suit is ruined. I had hoped to ruin it myself, but” She sigh dramatically, the Doctor blushing more than ever. “I suppose my time will come.” River rolled her eyes, and pointed at Jenny, who automatically stood up, ready to run wherever she needed to be as soon as she knew what was going on.

 

River’s blunt statement finally appeared to snap The Doctor out of it, and he jumped. “Oh! Right. Vastra woke up and is going crazy inside the TARDIS and I think she's too hormonal to stop so some help perhaps?” He smiled, embarrassed and uncomfortable and maybe a little scared and Jenny almost thought she would faint dead because holy god her wife was a daft old lizard in the most convenient of moments, and trying to stop her from running amok inside the TARDIS - possibly naked, after ripping her nightgown to shreds while laying her eggs - and pumped full of hormones as a result of said egg laying sounded like a suicide mission at best.

 

Yet, this was her wife and she held a responsibility.

 

“I’m on it, ma’am. “ She mumbled, slightly dazed and trying to figure out if she was an idiot or not, so shocked that she found herself not even caring to wait for either of the lovebirds as she ran away, out into the hall and up the stairs and all the way back to her bedroom.

 

Ten or fifteen minutes, she's back in her room, only to see that Strax and Rory have been placed as guards outside the TARDIS, and that Vastra had been moved from the bed.

 

“Puny human!” Strax start, commanding as always, before smiling his most sinister smile. “Your help is required.”

 

“Where's Vastra?” She can't help the tone of worry. Vastra’s not laying in their bed no longer, obviously, and nor is the eggs.” And the ch- eggs?” She almost say children. Almost. She doesn't know if they're wanted or if they have the chance of surviving, but she thinks of them as her children. Hers and Vastras. 

 

“The Doctor moved them to the medi-bay. He wanted the TARDIS help to conduct some tests to make absolutely sure that she didn’t suffer any harm from laying the eggs, since it was her first time, and a complicated first time at that. She more or less went ballistic when she woke up though, so Amy got her locked in the medi-bay. Last I looked she stopped trying to break the door anyway.” Rory gave her a long, sympathetic look. “You  _ sure _ you want to go in there? She could hurt you.”

 

“Would Amy hurt you?” Jenny look at him, challenging, all determination and fake confidence, challenging him. “I’m her mate. She won’t harm me. Not ever.” 

 

Rory sigh, and without another word, both he and Strax move out of the way, leaving her to her own destiny.  _ This is on you, I warned you _ , his look seemed to say, as she finally stepped onboard the spacecraft and tried not to hesitate.

 

Rpry didn’t mean the meaning of a mate for Silurians. He didn’t know the  _ promise  _ it carried.

 

She step into the control room, giving herself a moment to marvel at the fact that it was indeed bigger on the inside, something that came as the same surprise every time, before reminding herself she had a mission.

 

If only she knew where the med-bay was, which, as it happened, she didn’t. She knew vastra had been taken there, once, when she came down with a very alien-flu after staying otu in the cold for too long, but Jenny oculdn’t recall the way over all the worry that had dominated her mind at the time.

 

“Amy?” She hesitentely called out,hoping the redhead tasked with guarding her wife would answer. 

 

“Jenny?” The redhead came when called by her name, appearing in the control room with a clear look of relief on her face. She tries to put on a nonchalant attitude, but there are angry red scratches working the way up both her arms, most of them not deep but painful-looking, and Jenny frightens to think Vastra did it. “Come, I’ll show you.”

 

“Thanks.” Jenny smile, and let herself be led down one winding corridor after another, and another. It seemed as though the way they had to walk would never end. “Isn’t it impractical to have the...medi-bay? So far away from the entry.” She couldn’t help but wonder about the practical side of things. It would, for example, be absolutely impossible to drag Vastra down all these corridors if she was bleeding and on the verge of passing out. They wouldn’t even make it half-way there before someone was either dead or unable to keep moving.

 

“It’s usually closer.” Amy supplied helpfully, waving around a hand when speaking like the Doctor did, unintentionally showing off the red scratches even more. Those on her hands seemed deeper. “But the TARDIS has hidden it away because it felt the danger Vastra possessed. She’s afraid of sustaining damage to the mainframe, so she want to keep her away the control room, which is where we entered.”

 

Jenny blushed.  _ She felt the danger Vastra possessed _ . Suddenly, it felt like when they started working for Scotland Yard. Everyone was convinced she should be locked up less she’d be the death of them. Jenny, in their eyes, must be out of her mind for not running as fast and far as she possibly could. “She’s not this violent normally.” It’s a weak excuse, and she can hear how pathetic she sounds herself, btu she needed to defend her wife.

 

The scariest was that she wasn’t sure that Vastra  _ wouldn’t  _ kill them, if all her composure had truly flown out the window. If she was truly just going on instincts and hormones, there was no saying what she would and wouldn't do.

 

Amy's injuries proved as much, and it scared her.

 

“I know, honey.” Amy look at her with that special look, that it seems only she and her daughter knows how to procure, and Jenny can feel something akin to courage building up in her chest. The feeling of being understood, and believed.

 

Jenny hadn’t gotten much of it in her entirely adventurous life.

 

“I’m going to go to my wife now!” Jenny says suddenly, with more confidence than she actually carry, bargain past Amy and rushing down the corridor. She got her eyes on the big white door with a red cross and the yellow sign that read med-bay, and she doesn't even acknowledge Amy as she tried to follow, grabbing her arm to try and stop her from going anywhere. 

 

“Jenny wait just let me…” Amy tries to stop her, to make her slow down when hse’s already waisted valuable time, and suddenly she doesn’t seem as understanding but is rather acting like Rory, and Jenny feel so mad but at the same time she can also understands. She understands that Amy’s understanding, but also  _ scared,  _ because her wife  _ hurt  _ her and she doesn't want Jenny to be hurt too.

 

But Jenny couldn’t be afraid like that. She could not afford to fear her wife, to see the dangerous animal everyone else saw, because if she did, she wasn’t sure she could ever go back to seeing her any other way.

 

“I’m going in there. I’m talking to my wife. I’m not waiting, I’m not letting you sedate her, no nothin’. She is not a monster or an animal. She is a sentient being with a conscious mind and feelings. She is a mother protecting her children. You should know how that feels, shouldn't you?!” She is shouting, voice rising and so does the anger. She can see the sadness in Amelia’s eyes, and suddenly she is letting go of her arm.

 

“I’m sorry” She murmurs and Jenny doesn’t even bother to look at her as she goes through the door, closing it with a crash behind her.

 

She shouldn’t be acting like this, btu her emotions feels like tidalwaves, anger and sadness and fear and worry replacign eachother and htiting against the shores of her mind, one after another until she barely knew in nor out and only had her own instincts to go on, no matter how unreliable they might be   
  



	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, let's see what happened with Vastra in the medi-bay, shall we?

 

 

Vastra had woken up to an unknown room, her mind a throbbing, dizzy mess of thoughts and instincts screaming inside her head. She could, she discovered, not at all remember what had happened. Everything in her mind was blank and the deeper she digged in her memories the more her skull hurted, searing pain collecting at the front of her skull. Finally, she didn’t have the energy to try and deduce what was going on and simply gave up..

 

She  felt _so very tired_ , emptied out and deprived  any kind of energy that normally filled her muscles and limbs, forcing her to stay where she was and not moving. The only thing she had the energy to move, was her head, and so she did, looking up at the ceiling and hissing in surprise at what she saw.

 

The ceiling above her was covered in post-it notes of the kind used on 21st century Earth. Hundreds of them, if not thousands, each with varying colour in everything from green to red, but often very obtrusive and attention-attracting hues of the colour.

 

Because there was writing on them, too, and the first things Vastra noticed was the green note that said _chocolate is toxic to Silurians,_ a truth which both The Doctor and Jenny learnt that one fateful Valentine's Day years back when they tried to bake cookies for her. The next one she see is an orange note that said _Donna is allergic to dust_ , though regrettably Vastra couldn’t tell who _Donna_ was or had been, having been missing more things in The Doctor’s life than she’d experienced since the day she met him. Lastly, her eyes fall on the big lettered warnings written on probably fifty bright pink notes next to each other: _The Doctor is allergic to Aspirin_ , and _Hazelnuts make Timelords high (Bumfuzzled)_.

 

_The Doctor_

 

_Timelords_

 

Suddenly, without warning, he, the man she just pulled out the memory of her tired brain, was there by her side, poking a sonic into her side as her mind was suddenly starting to come back and remember everything that happened, a sudden surge of Adrenalin having her sitting up and ready to fight.

 

She didn’t quite know why she was feeling this way yet, but she felt a need to protect someone or something. Badly.

 

“Heeessssch!” _Protect_ , she hiss, the Silurian word coming more easily off her lips than her native language had done in years, her nerves getting more frayed and high strung without reason for every passing minute. Something or someone important was missing, and she needed to find it or them.

 

If she wasn’t so tired, maybe she could remember better.

 

“Vastra! Relax, it's okay!” The Doctor is there, again, with the sonic screwdriver and the buzzing and oh god it was really starting to get on her nerves because it sounded _threatening_ from a Silurian standpoint, the low buzzing so familiar to her own language, to hte battle cry she’d been taught to fight for. She tense, and she can see the humans that traveled with the The Doctor, Amy and Rory, coming closer in the corner of her eye. Probably, The Doctor instructed them to stand by in case she turned violent. Not that she knew why they would assume that of her. She felt tense, protective,  but she wasn’t _violent_ when provoked.

 

“Relax, your eggs are safe. You're safe.” The redhead, Amy, is coming up beside her and grabbing her arm, trying to sooth her, but Vastra can’t hear what she’s saying, the words are not making it through to her ears, and she can feel her mind racing at her arms, memories filing back into her mind at a thousand miles an hour.

 

She had laid eggs. Real, big, Silurian eggs, and they hadn’t broken. They were hole, preserved and alive by some act of god that she had never dared to hope for... But where were they? Had they taken them? Broken them? _Where were her eggs?!_

 

Logic rushes out the door at the same speed as what had happened comes back to her and suddenly she's throwing herself past Amy, off the bed and scampering over to the corner of the room and curling up to hide and protect herself.

 

_Tactical advantage, you can see the entire space before you._

 

She sweep her gaze across the room, observing, looking for exits and looking for her eggs, the instinctual need to have them within her line of sight beating like multiple heartbeats inside her.

 

“Vastra…” The Doctor is careful, hands held up in protection, Sonic Screwdriver rested in one of them.

 

The Sonic immediately catch her attention, and she hiss, low and rumbling as the sound come all the way from her stomach. It is a  threat, for that thing not to threaten her back with it’s low, buzzing battle cry that caught her never ends on fire.

 

 _Danger_ , her mind calculate, quick and direct, remembering the low buzzing, the sound mimicking a Silurian battle warning so closely. _Don't trust_.

 

“Nasch! Sssich tech hacht?!” _No! where are my hatchlings?!_ She hasn't spoken so much Silurian in such a long time and her jaw ache from working half-forgotten words across her tongue, the tongue muscles stretching and moving in a way she thought they forgot. But she can’t remember any other language now, can't gather anything else from her fuzzy brain as her instincts ruled her actions.

 

Her head snaps from side to side, looking, searching, glaring down upon the other three occupants of the room as they stare back, scared and apparently refusing to answer her question.

 

“Calm down!” She hears more unfamiliar noise, unfamiliar language, but she can’t translate and instead she hiss and keep looking out for he beloved eggs.

 

Finally, after what feels like forever, she sees them, her eggs. Two small brown female eggs and a big green male egg. A perfect clutch like she’d always dreamed off, longingly staring at hatchlings some of her older sisters would push around and show off to whoever was willing to look. They’d been proud for their heritage and DNA to live on, and scorned her for her continued lack of surviving cluthes.

 

 _The only mercy when her sisters were killed, was the lack of hatchlings onboard_.

 

Entirely different memories that are much older and much more violant are suddenly assaulting her and she hiss for the tenth time that minute, pushing memories back and forcing herself to focus on her own eggs, standing right infront of her on the other side of the room. They are lying in a bowl full of multi-coloured quilts on the other side of the room, and immediately she tense.  The Doctor and both companions are placed in between her and the eggs.

 

They’re not holding her away from them, but her mind tell her that they do.

 

_Attack, danger, protect_

 

“Heeessssch!” _Protect_ , she screams, wild and feral as she attack what's closest to her, attack The Doctor.

 

She promised him to never do that. She promised the only ones she’d hunt or kill would be the lowest lowelifes the society had to offer. The murderers and rapists that deserved no mercy. Not her friend, not the lovely Doctor and his faithful companions.

 

Her promise was, to never, ever hurt him ever again, and yet, She does. Her claws are razor sharp and ready and she's desperate, throwing him to the ground in an attempt to overpower him as she rips his suit to shreds, ripping loose chunks of protective clothing and exposing soft, vulnerable flesh that she scar with blood red scratches.

 

He tries to lift up the sonic screwdriver, pointing it against her and try to buzz, but she push it out of his hand, throw it to the floor to try and obliviate the danger. It won’t break, she’s sure, but maybe she can neutralize it at least. Make it impossible for it to buzz and threaten her in that almost Silurian sounding way that make her want to _hurt_ more than she already does.

 

Without his screwdriver, The Doctor finally seems to understand the danger he is in, and starts shouting wildly, hurling some sort of commands at his companions who immediately comes after her, trying to separate her from the doctor before she hurt him further.

 

She doesn’t care.

 

She doesn’t care that they’re scared and The Doctor is hurt and deep down she knows she is doing something wrong. All she can think of is the fact that the other two humans are closing in and further blocking her view of her eggs, the precious eggs she must protect. So she attack again and again. She scratch and hit at exactly everything in sight without caring for the consequences or even who she hurts until finally, she’s got a clear path so that she can reach her eggs, comfortably placed in a bowl full of blankets on the table.

  


In her mind, the eggs are everything that matter. She feel the needs in her core, the impulses flooding her mind and telling her what to do. What she has do. She han’t evacuate the area, make the other occupants leave so she and eggs and so she chase them out. Even though they are already leaving on their own accord, she chase them to the door and when it close in front of her she throws herself against it over and over again until she’s managed to empty herself of all the frustration and anger boiling in her chest. When she slide down to the ground beside the door, she can feel that she’s probably done herself some damage, bruised and hurt herself by fighting against the hard material of the TARDIS door.

Not that she didn’t deserve it, after all she’d done.

 

As the frustration and anger finally start to leave her, what she has done finally start to settle upon her, and all anger and panic was suddenly replaced by an utter feeling of despair. Surely, she was never going to be able to live this down nor earn the forgiveness of those she hurt. What had she’d been thinking? How could she have done something like this? She hadn’t been thinking. Not at all. She’d been running on instincts and fear, and now that she once more had something even closely resembling a clear state of mind, she realised how badly she acted.

 

Trying to keep her feelings internalised - she’d already hurt someone by letting them loose once - Vastra finally curled up around the little bowl with her three eggs, her three babies that somehow made it into this world hole and with a chance of surviving, reasoning that if nothing else she could always protect her children that she’d already fought so hard for.

  
If nothing else, she could stay there, curled up with the eggs halfway in under her and pretend as though she had not just harmed her most loyal friend, surely destroying his confidence in her forever.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> River and The Doctor after Jenny left them to go help Vastra - what do they do? Is this when River get laid? Do you want her to get laid? Read and comment and we'll see
> 
> Beta'd by Yolo1882

 

“River, what did you tell her? Did you...do you know any spoilers of the future? Did you tell Jenny anything?” The Doctor smiled sheepishly, unsure if it was the right thing  to ask when he didn’t even know if she was from their future, past or present. “Are you from the future?”

 

River arched an eyebrow right back, giving him a little smirk. “Yes I am from the future. No, you know I can’t tell of the future. Spoilers and all that, sweetie.” She moves closer to him, hands coming up to rest on his chest, fingers tracing the beet red scratches hiding behind the torn remains of his clothes. “Did Vastra do this to you? I mean, she used to do the same to me, but I do think there’s a difference. No fun when Jenny’s around, and definitely no fun with you.” She comments, and though she somehow manage to squeeze in a very crude innuendo The Doctor can still tell that the worry is honest.

  


“Yes.” He answers, embarrassed and uncomfortable. Even with the scandalous offhanded comment at the end it was still far softer than River’s usual loud-mouthed statements. “I scared her. It was not her fault, I didn’t count on her hormone balance to be off, or account for her dislike for the noise the Sonic Screwdriver makes. Should have known better, really.”

 

At this River honestly looked a bit surprised. “So she finds the noise annoying too? No wonder, what with all that high pitched buzzing. Almost drives me insane half the time. Only tolerate it because it is handy.” She smiled, rolling her eyes and popping down on the nearest couch. Jenny and Vastra’s house was well decorated, and though it felt a bit too _cozy_ for River’s taste, plenty of furniture to go around did come in handy as well.

  


“Yeah, though I’ve been told it more than just irritates Silurians. Sounds like the battle cry of a giant sentient wasp, apparently.  They were our dear prehistoric lizard’s natural enemies.” He smiled a little, plopping down next to his wife. “But really, what are you doing here? I don’t dare to hope my wife tracked me down just to hear me speak of prehistoric sentient wasps.” Now he smile for real, a huge silly grin just the way he knows she likes it, but this time she’s frowning.

 

“I was aiming for _you_ , so I could get _laid_ .” She said, drop-dead serious. “I did not want to go through this _again_.” She keeps her eyes fixed on him, and he can tell she’s reliving the memory of something yet to happen at this point in time.

 

“Then you know how this supposed to be. You know what's going to happen to the eggs.” He has to say it, because maybe, just maybe, she was meant to help him. Maybe the Universe was throwing him a bone and helping him figure out what he was to do for Vastra and Jenny.

 

He knew he had to find a way to have the eggs fertilized, preferably with Jenny somehow being involved, but he didn't know how that was to happen. In ancient Silurian culture, far from all eggs were even allowed to be fertilized, meaning that even if he took them to the appropriate time, they might not grant a male the right to fertilize the eggs. Warrior class Silurian usually had their eggs fertilized, as they had attributes worthy of being passed on, but since this was Vastra’s first surviving clutch they might be seen as inferior and weak, and therefore, unworthy.

  


All in all, The Doctor realised he needed to find a new way, but had not yet been able to invent what that ‘new way’ was going to be. And therefore, he was hoping River would help him out.

 

“I did not want to tell you. I told myself I was not going to tell you. I don’t want to change the future.” She glance at him, and he can see her defense is failing. She want to tell him, want to make sure that the future turns out the way she’s seen it. “But maybe it was I who told you of this all along. You never said that to me, whispering ‘spoilers’ like the bloody idiot you are!”

 

“Which..which me was it?” He asked tentatively. She is very close to giving away the answer to his conundrum, and he hopes that making her focus on the thought, the memory, will make her walls cave in finally. Not to mention that he wonders. He wonder if it’s he who is going to fix it or if the knowledge will have to pass on to the man who is to follow.

 

At this, River furrow her brows, looking at him as though she was suddenly unsure of what she was seeing - the look remained in her eyes for a few minutes, but then she nodded. “You. You will fix this. It’s right in front of you and you just don’t see it, but I hope you will.”  

 

He didn’t know what she was going for. She seemed determined not to say more, lest she overstepped the boundaries of what she could say without changing the outcome of the future, but he felt that what she had given him wasn’t enough.

 

“I don’t know what you’re trying to say. It’s not enough. I need you to tell me River!” He hated begging, hated trying to try and  extract information from someone unwilling to give it, but it  was his only option. He’d sent Jenny to check on Vastra, and as soon as she came back he had to have a plan ready. “When Jenny comes back I need to have a plan, and you're not giving me one!”

 

“Fine! I will tell you! I will tell you and I  will hope that I don’t fuck up the beautiful family that Vastra and Jenny are going to have!” River is screaming right back, frustrated as she knows that all her tact and grace has led nowhere, and blunt words was all she had left. “There is a technique that’ll allow you to use Jenny’s DNA to fertilize eggs. You’ll get them from a friend working at a research facility in old new New York. More than that, I don’t know about the details. I only know it’s an aperture that’ll allow you to rescue the eggs and make sure Jenny get her DNA in the mix, too.”

 

The Doctor smiled, seizing River’s hands in a sudden rush of happiness, leaning so close to River that they were all but kissing all ready, and placed a quick peck on her lips. “Thank you, River! You’re a real lifesaver!”

  
River smiled, too. She was so happy that things seemed to be developing as they should. There was nothing she wanted more than to see the future unfold to what she had seen, even if it meant dropping spoilers that she  wasn’t actually sure she should reveal.  Because she had long ago decided, that for the future from where she came, she’d do anything.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> here we go again I really am sorry but at the same time I regret nothing

Jenny could feel her heart hammering in her chest as she seized the door, opening it and stepping inside. She didn’t know what to expect, and was half ready to flee again if Vastra proved too dangerous to be around, but tried to silence her fears best she could.

 

Vastra would never attack her. She would recognise her as her mate, and it’d stop her from attacking. It had to. Vastra wasn’t a monster, after all, just scared and hormonal.

 

As she came into the medi-bay, a room in the TARDIS that she had not been in before, it was not as she expected it to be.

 

The walls were sterile and white as expected, but the ceiling was covered in small paper notes in the most outrageous colours, and the floor was littered with medical equipment. A lot of it, though unfamiliar, appeared broken or deformed, and Jenny guessed it was the result of the battle with Vastra.

 

The lizard herself could be seen poking out from behind an overturned table in the corner, soft snoring emanating from the same direction and indicating that Vastra's fallen asleep. 

  


Jenny smiled. At that moment, she could almost convince herself it was a normal day at home with a few too many sherbet fancies for both Vastra and Strax. She could almost, almost convince herself that everything was as it should be, and nothing was wrong.

 

But as soon as she peek behind the table, wanting to properly see her wife, the hopeless hope that everything was as it had always been broke. Behind the table, Vastra was laying on the floor, fast asleep, just as Jenny's imagined, but her body is curled in on itself and arched around a plastic bowl full of quilts. Buried among the quilts, are the eggs.

 

The sight of the eggs press the air out of Jenny’s lungs. She’s never noticed it before, not in the fear and chaos that had been dominated her since the moment they came into this world,but now she notices how truly beautiful they are. The one placed in the middle is almost twice the size of the two smaller ones, and a glittering emerald like Vastra’s scales when they catch the sunlight. Her hand, slightly trembling, comes out to touch it. It is warm to the touch and a little uneven, yet still smooth like silk. The two smaller brown eggs are equally beautiful, if less brilliant in it’s colour, and are also warm. It was not hard for Jenny to imagine a little heart beating inside it, though there was none yet, and she could feel the tears rising his her eyes.

 

“Jenny?” Suddenly the body, the green mass curled around the bowl with the eggs start to move, snoring subsiding and big sapphire blue eyes opening to look at her. There is surprise and pain in equal amounts etched on her face and Jenny wish she could go inside her head because she wishes to see what was dwelling within there .

 

“Vastra?” She answered, quite, careful, almost scared. She wanted to hug her, want to hold her close and never let go because she love her. After everything she’s put her through, the only thing that was still left when she stood there and looked at her, is her love for her. How much she loved her and wanted everything to be okay. “What happened? Why didn’t you tell me?” But she needed to know what had happened. How the eggs could be there, when she told her she lost them  How she could have kept it from her, if she knew that they were surviving, Everything, that they should have done together, should have planned and cooperated, yet Vastra had let it slip. Jenny needed to know why.

 

Vastra's eyes moved from her face, taking hold of the floor and putting all her focus there. “I didn’t know what else to do. I could...I could feel them growing. Strong, living eggs. They were going to be alright.” Her statement was followed by a strangely strangled sound, somewhere between a sob and a shout of pain. If Vastra had been able to cry, she was sure the tears would be flowing down her cheeks. “I knew you didn’t want them.” She curled in tighter around the bowl, protective, and Jenny could feel the horror flowing through her body and settling like ice in her gut.

 

Vastra didn’t think she’d want a family, and chose to hide it from her instead. Before her eyes, Jenny could see Vastra’s claws closing in around her abdomen as they first talked of children, the motion and the look in her eyes telling Jenny that what they talked of was something that she wanted more than anything. And she’d been ready to give it up, just for her.

 

“I want them, Vastra.” She said, trying to keep her voice from breaking but it’s hard. So very hard. “I never said I didn’t want children, I just never thought...You didn’t tell me. You should have told me.” She keep reverting back to that portion of what had happened, because it kept irking her. She couldn’t believe how she could be so scared of what Jenny would say that she didn’t even tell her. Tears were rising in her eyes again and she just couldn’t believe it.

 

Vastra uncurled slightly, her grip on the bowl with the eggs easing, and it hit Jenny that Vastra had been _protecting_ them. She’d been so scared of what Jenny had to say about her eggs that she’d instinctively taken to protecting them, fearing Jenny would hurt them.

 

“Oh...oh! Come here, you stupid lizard.” She tried to approach her, want to hold her close because she love her big, daft and green lizard woman from the Dawn of time more than there are words to describe.

 

“NO! Don’t…” As Jenny approach, Vastra pulled back, flinging herself against the wall in an attempt to escape. “I’ll hurt you. Like I hurt The Doctor and Amy and Rory!” There’s a different sort of fear in her eyes, now, and it made Jenny’s heart ache even more to see it, because she could that tell her wife was genuinely afraid of what she might do if Jenny came too close.

 

“You _won’t_.” Jenny quickly reassured, moving closer and all but forcing Vastra into her arms, wrapping herself around her naked wife as she hold her close, refusing to let go.They can’t run from it anymore, even if she literally had to force Vastra to accept what was happening by pinning her down until she came to her senses. At first, Vastra was tense, every muscle in her body straining as she waited for herself to do something unforgivable, but eventually, she relaxed. Her body leaned in against Jenny’s, her arms recuperating the embrace, and Vastra smiled. “Told you.” Jenny teased gently.

 

“So we’re becoming a family?” It rolled off Vastra's tongue once they’ve broken their embrace, sapphire eyes meeting rich brown, and there was a static between them, an anticipation and excitement as they waited for the verdict.

 

Jenny was almost as relieved as Vastra when she finally noddded. “If the Doctor can make it happen.” She promised, once more roping her wife into a tight hug. If only the doctor could solve it, it was all going to be okay.

 

After realising that Vastra was still stark naked, they quickly wrapped her up in a red quilt they found abandoned on the floor, and then Jenny picked up their eggs in her arms and they walked side by side out of the medibay, fully intending to find the doctor and tell him of their choice.

 

They were going to be parents, and it felt alright.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FINALLLY! A new chapter! Loooots of fun! And tears! And the doctor! Just read it and you'll understand ok????
> 
> Edited by always amazing YOLO1882
> 
> Please do also check out 'Love at first lizard', a collaboration between me and YOLO1882 that is also Jenny/Vastra

As Jenny and Vastra entered the TARDIS control room, they discovered, to their great surprise, that they were no longer alone aboard the TARDIS. 

 

Rory and Amy were sitting on top a pile of blankets, cuddling each other with their backs to the console, and River Song was sitting perched on the edge of a chair on the upper floor, one hand absentmindedly rubbing at Strax’s head as the Sontaran sat and played with his grenades on the floor beside her.

 

The moment Vastra and Jenny appeared, all eyes in the room were immediately drawn to them, their eyes focusing like laser beams on the pair standing in the doorways. It made them feel suddenly scared and a bit flustered, because Vastra’s thin coverage  suddenly felt not nearly enough.

 

“Oh,  hello sweeties!”  River’s faced morphed into a perfect expression of intense glee, eyes glistening as she bent over the railing to  admire Vastra’s relatively curvy form in the thin red blanket that was tightly attached the the Silurians body.

 

“Oi! Leave my wife alone!” Jenny rebuked within a second, glaring at River as she stepped in between them to block River’s view of Vastra. “We’re having babies! You can’t go ogling her, happily married mothers to be is not on your menu!”

 

Frowning a little, River sigh dramatically. “ Fine , at least you’ve come to a decision. Not that I didn't know you would.” The smile is less teasing,now, and more of a genuinely happy one. 

 

Amy and Rory, who is sitting off to the side, is smiling too, though Vastra notice that Amy us a bit tense. Red scratches still covers Amy’s hands and arms, and she can't help but let out a whimper as she suddenly remembers why, sadness filling her as she is reminder of what she did. She hadn’t meant to, she really hadn’t, but it had been as though she had no choice. She’d been compelled to do it by an invisible force, and kow she regretted it more than anything else.

 

Clearly noticing Vastra's distress, Jenny moved closer, allowing her wife to wrap her arms around her and pull her close. “S’alright, Vastra. It’s not your fault.” She said soothingly, glaring and Amy and Rory as though daring them to disagree, before once more glancing up at River again. “Has anyone seen The Doctor? I reckon he might want to know how we’ve decided about the eggs?”

 

“He’s out there, fixing some kind of miracle cure to get your eggs fertilised. It’s all in a day’s work for The Doctor.” River smile, hanging lazy over the railing as she spoke, gesturing to the double doors of the TARDIS. “Might as well sit down with us others and wait. You got nothing to do in New New York.”

 

Seeing that there really was nothing else to do, Vastra nodded, and both her and Jenny quickly sat down upon the ground along with everyone else, smiling quite gratefully as Amy and Rory immediately offered them a few pillows and quilts, which they arranged around them, the bowl with eggs being placed on one of the pillows, and the quilts being wrapped around Vastra’s shoulders and body. Finally, Jenny guided the lizard down into her lap, putting a few pillows under her head as well for good measure. 

 

“It’s all going to be alright, my fantastic lizard.” Jenny whispered, placing a kiss on Vastra’s cheek as her eyes started to drop and she started to fall asleep, still so truly exhausted from what she had gone through.

 

Seeing Amy and Rory drowsing off as well, Jenny still didn’t feel tired in the slightest, which was really surprising, but resigned herself to having to spend a few boring hours as everyone slept away the time till The Doctor returned

 

She’s been sitting there fifteen minutes, maybe twenty, when there's a voice from above her. “I wish I could have a life like yours, you know.” The voice is soft and but a tiny bit fragile.

 

She glanced up, and see River watching her from the second floor. Strax was sleeping in her own lap and she was smiling wistfully, a dreamy expression on her face.

 

“You could.” Jenny said, kindly, smiling and stroking Vastra across the head. The sleeping lizard snorted in her sleep, and Jenny laughed.

 

River laughed, too, shaking her head. “Never.” She said happiness morphing into bitter resentment. “Not...not with The Doctor...and my past. I’ll never have that easy, blissful life you have.”

  
  


Jenny couldn’t help but laugh, because River looked so wistful and hopeful and actually  wanting , as if the life she and Vastra lived was all she’d ever wanted - as if it was so much more perfect than anyone else’s. 

 

Seeing her laugh, River frowned, her gaze hardening and her persistent stroking of the head of the sleeping Sontaran in her lap increased. If Jenny didn’t know better, if she didn’t   know  River Song, then she would almost say that she was offended. Only she didn’t believe she was, because she was River Song, and River Song didn’t get offended - she was the one that offended people. 

 

“I  mean it.” River Song said finally, her stroking of Strax thick skull slowing down. “If...If The Doctor offered me all you have, I’d take it. It doesn't sound like me, it isn't like me, but I’d take it. I’d do everything to have someone waiting when I walk through the door each night, to not have to have  graffiti  the oldest cliff face in the Universe or seen time and space being torn apart just to get to talk to my  husband .” There are tears gathering in River’s eyes now, and while it makes Jenny’s heart ache, it also makes a sudden, violent burst of anger flare up inside her.

 

She and Vastra wasn’t this pure. She didn’t know the future, didn't know what she had seen, but  there, in the present , they really weren't as pure as River made up to be, and it made her angry. So angry.

 

“We aren't always pure, you know.” She said, her eyes focusing on River’s innocent dreamy face as she wished she could just grab that expression and drag it right off her face because it was so  wrong . “We aren't as pure and lucky and perfect as you say. Yes, we are married, and we live in the same house, but what use is that, when we can't wear our own wedding rings in public? When we can't see ourselves as equals when there is someone else in the room, and barely even when we  are alone! We aren’t even the same species and…”

 

“Me and The Doctor aren’t the same species, either. He is an ancient Time Lord and I am something entirely else that…”

 

“That will live for at least a good chunk of the time he has left!” Jenny try to keep her voice down, not wanting to wake up the rest of the inhabitants of the room, but she felt as though her blood was boiling when she heard River's words. “I won't live for even a fraction of the time Vastra will. I don't know if Vastra will ever stop eating my species.  My people !” She shudders, tears dripping down her cheeks at last, and when River seemed about to interject again, she shook her head. “Don’t you dare!” She hissed, warningly, her eyes ablaze as she glared at the other woman with all her might. “You don’t  know . There is only so much I can take, and  compromises just to keep everything together, but in the end, what use is all this, if my wife is too scared to tell me she is expecting three children? If she won't even consider the thought of having children, which I know she wants, because of me, a silly little mammal? A stupid, stupid, silly, short-lived mammal…”

 

There are tears cascading down her face, dropping down on Vastra’s head below, but she doesn’t stir, and somehow Jenny was grateful for that small mercy. They’d already discussed all this at  length so many times, it should be resolved, and it had felt resolved, but now it suddenly came back to haunt Jenny and she didn't  want Vastra to know.

 

For once silent, River sat on the upper railing, watching her worriedly as she cried, following Jenny’s instructions and not doing anything. For several moment, both women just sat there, one observing the other, waiting for something, anything to happen. 

 

That something, anything, of course, turned out to be The Doctor.

 

With a great big slamming of the doors and screaming and ‘a man just a little bit on fire coming through’ he zoomed past them all, running through the console room and into the corridor to the medibay with his arms very much on fire and burning steadily, no one barely having time to register what happened before he was gone.

 

As the rest of the room started waking up from the commotion, confused and slow to react as one was when tired, River quickly made her way down the stairs to join up at Jenny’s side. Gingerly,  she grabbed her by the arm.

 

“River!” The other woman jumped, startled, and as she turned towards her. River could see that there was still leftover tears in her eyes, breaking River’s heart as tried to blink them away unsuccessfully.

 

Leaning in, River wrapped her arm around the other's waist, her voice softening considerably. “I just wanted to say, that Vastra  loves you. Whatever happens, you love each other, and there is nothing and nobody that can ever take that away from you. Trust someone from the future, we know this sort of thing.” She winked, and new tears welled up in Jenny’s eyes, but she smiled, nodding.

 

“You’ll get your happily ever after, too.” Jenny said, the word slipping out of her mouth before she could stop them, and she decidedly ignored River’s surprise stricken face as Vastra tugged on her arm, calling her attention. Jenny was happy for the distraction, her stomach flipping uncomfortably at how close she’d been to give away the doctor's ultimate plan - his final surprise.

 

“Jenny…. Jenny what is happening?” Vastra is clutching her arm, begging for her attention as she keep her gaze at the entrance through which The Doctor had disappeared. She sounded acutely distressed, and like almost everything else in her current situation it hurt. All the relaxation and happiness that the heart to heart speech ìn the medbay had given her was blown away, some of the wounds reopened after her talk with River.

 

“I don't know. The Doctor came running into here with his arms on fire.” Jenny smiled, desperately trying to shed light on the situation and higher the mood. “Don’t dare to think what he’s done.”

 

“Me neither. Raggedy man does whatever he wants, whenever he wants.” Amy butted in, a thin smile on her lips as she tries to untangle the tangles in her hair with her fingers.

 

“As long as he fix us the necessary things to save our eggs, he can do as he wish.” Vastra smiled, though sounding just a tad bit annoyed with the Doctor’s shenanigans. Jenny smile too, because the warmth and happiness radiating off her mate was enough to make the world feel alright, closing all the wounds and pushing the anguish back into the darkest corners of her mind.

 

“As long as you know what you’re getting into. I certainly didn't!” Rory is laughing, smiling, and River is giving them her most indulgent smile, and Jenny was smiling like a sun because now it really did feel good.

 

They're all smiling and laughing and probably looking slightly high, the only exception being Strax who was still sitting on the upper level and muttering obscenities under his breath, but no one was paying him any attention, poor thing. Knowing him, it was probably the equal of children’s songs when he felt happy. 

 

And the, finally, The Doctor came back. He came forth, all of them automatically parting for him like the sea for moses, the only thing in his way left was the eggs. And so, he walked to the, picked them up in his arms, and turned to face the rest of the room.

 

He smiled. “Now, ladies and gentlemen, let's get to work on project make Vastra and Jenny parents.”

  
  


 


End file.
